Accomplishments While US President: o Attacked and invaded two countries so far, losing more US soldiers after I claimed "Mission Accomplished" than the total number who were killed during full combat operations in both wars combined. o Spent the largest surplus in the history of the country and nearly bankrupted the treasury. o Shattered records for the biggest annual deficit in history. o Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in a 12 month cycle of any presidency, beating the previous record which was set during the depression years. o Set all-time record for biggest loss of value in the history of the stock market during any presidency. o First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner. o First president in US history to enter office with a criminal record. o First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history. o After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in US history, the September 11 attack on the World Trade Center. o Set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips on Air Force 1 than any other president in US history. o In my first three years in office over 3.3 million Americans lost their jobs, so I asked for another $550,000,000,000 in tax cuts because they're obviously working. o Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history. o Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period. o Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history. o Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television. o Presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to intervene when ENRON corruption was revealed and many states faced bankruptcy. o Presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have. o Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans while posing on aircraft carriers in a flight suit, despite praising the troops at every opportunity. o Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind. o Dissolved or abandoned more international treaties than any president in US history. o My presidency is the most secretive and unaccountable of any in US history, surpassing the secrecy of the Nixon administration at its darkest moments. o Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history. (the 'poorest' multi-millionaire, Condoleeza Rice has a Chevron oil tanker named after her) o First president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously reach the point of insolvency. o Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud (ENRON, WorldCom, Global Crossing) of any market in any country in the history of the world. o First president in US history to order a unilateral and unprovoked attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation. o First president in US history to start a war against the will of the United Nations and the world community. o Created the largest new government bureaucracy (Department of Homeland Security) in the history of the United States. o Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in US history. o First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the human rights commission. o First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the elections monitoring board. o Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history. o Ignored the United Nations demands and requirements pursuant to international law and warfare. o I disregard states rights when it suits me, but I always run for office on a platform that holds states rights above federal rights. In fact, I got into office by having the US Supreme Court operate out of its own jurisdiction and trample over the sovereignty of the State of Florida. o I've imprisoned more sick people for growing and smoking medicinal Cannabis than any other president, in violation of states rights, of course, and against the wishes of the states and local voters. o My attorney General, John Ashcroft, is encouraged to, and always prevents, anyone charged with a medicinal Cannabis crime in a Federal court from using the defense that the majority of voters approved the activities in the case before the court, and that the alleged 'crime' was in fact perfectly legal activity and a well regarded resource for sick people in the state where it occurred. o Withdrew from the World Court (Permanent Court of International Justice) and I refuse to recognize it unless it gives my administration, the US and global corporations special immunity. o Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and refused to abide by the Geneva Conventions regarding prisoners of war by cleverly classifying them as "enemy combatants." thereby allowing us to circumvent the Geneva Conventions. o First president in US history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US elections). o All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations. o My personal friend and biggest life-time campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation). o Spent more money on polls and focus groups in the first two years of my presidency than any president in US history, despite claiming throughout my candidacy that I would not use polling data. o First president to run and hide when the US came under attack (of which he had foreknowledge/collusion), and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1. o First US president to establish a secret shadow government, and I did this without the knowledge or participation of the oppostion parties in congress. o Squandered world sympathy for the US after 9/11, and in less than a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history). o With a policy of 'disengagement' and open public support for war criminal Ariel Sharon, allowed and condoned the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years. o First US president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view the US as the biggest threat to world peace and stability. o First US president in history to have the people of South Korea feel more threatened by the US than their immediate neighbor, North Korea. o Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts. o Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts. o Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive'. o Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capital building - my Attorney General is more interested in Louisiana prostitutes and paraplegic pot smokers than in capturing so-called terrorists. o In the 18 months following the 911 attacks I have successfully prevented, stalled, diverted or spiked any real public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States. Additionally, I failed to capture any of the masterminds or people responsible for the attacks. o Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in US history. o In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the US has ever been since the civil war. o Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years turned every single economic category into a sharply downward trend. o Did nothing about the failing US power grid during the first two years of my presidency, despite repeated warnings, and later presided over the largest total power blackout in US history that incapacitated several states and part of Canada. o In order to prevent financing abortions in China, I cut off all $34 million of aid to the U.N. Population Fund, which was also used to provide medical care to pregnant teenagers with defective pregnancies who will now die or walk around trailing urine and feces for the rest of their lives. o A detailed record of my envronmental accomplishments is available here. o A detailed record of mine and my cabinet's history of service in the armed forces during times of war is available here.

Records and References: